Prince’s Chart Coronation

Prince is purple reigning on the charts.

The Rock and Roll Hall of Famer, who launched his career nearly three decades ago, scored his first ever number-one debut, as 3121 rolled up sales of 183,000 copies for the week ended Sunday, according to Nielsen SoundScan.

Behold, the power and the glory of FSM, for his legions of pastafarian followers shall scoop up your album by the truckload. It helps if you’re a fabulous pop song writer and an incredibly talented musician as well, but FSM’s benevolence is apparent - and necessary! - here.

Later on in the article, we are also presented with incontrovertible proof that we are in the decline phase of the empire

thanks to an American Idol guest appearance, Barry Manilow’s The Greatest Songs of the Fifties rocketed 22 spots to number four on 78,000 copies.

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