Dammit, I need to be quicker about these things. Apparently, the formerly-known-as-fun-and-cool Elfmans went apeshit over John Roecker’s shirt.
Indie film director John Roecker tells TMZ he was walking to his car with a female friend in LA’s trendy Los Feliz neighborhood last Sunday when he was approached by a shirtless man and a tall blonde. “Hey, man, you’re making fun of my religion,” said the stranger angrily.
Roecker quickly recognized the couple as actor Bodhi Elfman and his wife, ‘Dharma and Greg’ star Jenna Elfman. Mr. Elfman’s ire was apparently drawn by Roecker’s self-made t-shirt, which had a picture of Tom Cruise on the front under the caption “Scientology is Gay!” and a ‘Stayin’-Alive’-era John Travolta on the back with the words “Very Gay!” For the record, both Cruise and Travolta have said repeatedly they are not gay.
The shirt:
Here’s the thing, you coddled whiny ass titty baby scientologists (yeah, I’m talking to you too Isaac)… your religion is not special. Though you are pampered at every turn, though you are given accolades, tchotchkes, and are the recipient of constant ass kissing from every person within a 5 mile radius whose livelihood depends on the celebrity culture… you are not special. You are not Marie Antoinette. You are not Goaul’d. You are just another meat puppet sharing this rock, and if you are offended by a t-shirt, or the flavor of your mango chutney, or the fourth button on the arm of the couch… we don’t give a shit. Deal.
I didn’t intend for this to become pop culture blogging day, it’s just the most interesting news I’ve hit all morning.
The death of Zarqawi, while not a time for celebration, is certainly in the camp of Good Things. We must remember, however, that he was but a prop used by the Bush administration to increase domestic fear, distract the public (Osama!) from the real bad guys they couldn’t get, a justification for their own failures, and as a straw man for their delusions. I haven’t blogged on Zarqawi’s death because there’s not much to say; he was a criminal figurehead, had few ties with al Qaeda, was not all that powerful in Iraq, did not work well with others, and was no good in the field. He’s a bit player puffed up by the Bushies to be a big thing.
Unlike, you know, Osama bin Laden.
Read more…
Richard Phillips. What a penurious, stupid dickhead.
An unfortunate email exchange about an incident in which a secretary splashed tomato ketchup on his trousers has been doing the rounds, not only among his colleagues but in London’s legal community.
And it has left the 36-year-old solicitor, who is said to earn well over £100,000, with egg on his face after he demanded £4 to dry clean the trousers.
No, it totally wasn’t a propaganda ploy by the bloodthirsty chickenhawk neocons. At all.
Two weeks ago, Amir Taheri had an Op-Ed article in the Canadian National Post claiming that the Iranians have a law requiring Jews to wear yellow badges. It turned out to be a complete fabrication and has been the subject of much contempt among bloggers. So Tuesday, Taheri was invited to the White House along with other “experts” to give the president their “honest opinions.” With advice like that, our war in Iran will be a slam-dunk.
The funny thing about this movie is that there are clearly 3 groups to hate and mock here.
1. The dude who goes to the library to look at porn and whack off, AKA The Loser;
2. His dad, who obviously has anger management and likely substance abuse issues, AKA The Raging Asshole;
3. The reporter, who is a condescending prick constantly making references to THE CHILDREN (as in “this computer is only feet away from THE CHILDREN”) as if it is somehow relevant; AKA The Pandering Dickhead.
Anyway, the movie’s pretty cringeworthy. I considered it for humor Friday, but it’s just too sad and it didn’t really strike me as funny. I’ll have to keep looking.
(I would embed it here, but it breaks my site formatting, so until I take the time to fix it, youtube has the movie)
The dude is not only refusing to eliminate a run as an independent, but he’s also going to take his ball and go home.
After initially agreeing, Senator Lieberman has declined our invitation to participate in the MoveOn.org Political Action online primary for U.S. Senate in Connecticut.
The phrase ‘whiny little bitch’ comes to mind. In a completely gender-neutral sort of way, of course.
There are only 3 states with positive approval ratings for duhbya right now. Billmon calls them ‘Rump States’. I call them dead enders.
President Bush . . . has a positive job approval in just three of the 50 United States. This according to 50 separate but concurrent statewide public opinion polls conducted by SurveyUSA for its media clients across the country. Only residents of Utah, Wyoming and Idaho view the president favorably.
I’m amazed there are enough morons still around in any state to give him a majority approval anymore. You know, after the massive die-off from eating the bad batch of Goldstein paste.
A douchebag slamming a hoor while followed by a worthless sack of flesh, tittering away in her coke-filled delusions of importance. You know, these people live in a different, alien world. One that would twist any of us into something unrecognizable… but seeing it in action still makes me wish for a sudden impact, followed by lava, showers, and tidal waves.
But since nihhilistic misery deserves company… enjoy the video.
Women? Nothing more than walking uteruses
New federal guidelines ask all females capable of conceiving a baby to treat themselves — and to be treated by the health care system — as pre-pregnant, regardless of whether they plan to get pregnant anytime soon.
Got that? Even if you’re not pregnant, not trying to get pregnant, or have no desire to be pregnant, you should be treated as if you are about to become so, or want to become so, or are so already.
Up next: mandatory insertion of your husband’s seed, or your pre-husband if you don’t have one.
What do you do if you’re a part of a secret police force outside the law when the Law comes a knockin’? Why, you deny them the security clearance the need to investigate your actions, of course!
Q given to 3 different presidents – what was the greatest moment of your presidency? Here are the answers:
Carter: Camp David accords
Clinton: Solving the Kosovo crisis
Bush: when I caught a 7.5lb fish!!!!!11!1!1111!!
Even better is that the fish he caught? Was in his own private, man-made, self-stocked lake. Try no to strain yourself there with the difficult tasks, Bushie.
The entire secret-prison-US-tortures-people thing was a ruse to hunt out moles in the CIA.
You only wish I was kidding.
Cruise hates ‘his’ kid… almost as much as fishsticks Paltrow
Language experts are amazed Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have named their baby daughter Suri- because there is no record of the name meaning “Princess” in Hebrew. According to Hebrew linguists, Suri has only two meanings – one is a person from Syria and the other “go away” when addressed to a female. Hebrew expert JONATHAN WENT says, “I think it’s fair to say they have made a mistake here. There are variations of the way the Hebrew name for princess is spelt but I have never seen it this way.” Suri can also be translated into a Hindi boy’s name, and it also means “pointy nose” in some Indian dialects and “pickpocket” in Japanese.
Nice job dude. Naming ‘your’ daughter “go away, you pointy nosed pickpocket” is precisely the message I want to send when and if I breed.
I still say Holmes was wearing a prosthetic and the baby was adopted. It would have been awesome if the girl was not-white. That way, Tom could practice his denial doubly hard at the family cookouts.
war dissenters are the dupes and tools of Zarqawi and al Qaeda
There have always been people who have opposed wars…I think we just have to accept it, that people have a right to say what they want to say, and to have an acceptance of that and recognize that the terrorists, Zarqawi and bin Laden and Zawahiri, those people have media committees.
They are actively out there trying to manipulate the press in the United States. They are very good at it.
I would write more, but right now Zarqawi is making me pound my head into my desk for living in a country ruled by such morons.
If I were a fundie hack artist who couldn’t make a living at my chosen profession and who also had only moderate ability at same, I might dream up a scheme where I take a failed statue that was meant to glorify some portion of my dogma and then rechristen it with the name of some celebrity and the monetary backing of a group highly interested in that dogma.
You know, like the Spears “pro-life” Statue
That the statue is ridiculous, inelegant, and looks nothing like Spears, but hey, it’s a “dedication” to her refusal to use birth control and decision not to abort “pro-life” stance.
The next time I’m unemployed, I’m going to go to a Catholic church where they give out those Jesus trading cards for funerals. Then I’m going to go home, paste one to the back of a shampoo bottle and take a photo of the Jebus showing through on the other side. I’ll call it my “pro-life” shampoo. Then I’ll continue with my Jesusface grilled cheese sandwich plan. I’ll make millions!
Why is this humor Friday? Well, the “pro-life” statue is supposed to be at the moment of birth and the backside is showing a baby’s crown (suuuuure it’s Sean Preston). Only, I could never find a picture of the back side. Well, now I have. And it’s all yours, after the jump. Read more…
